| Published on | in Personal | | |
"Da steh ich nun, ich armer Tor,
und bin so klug als wie zuvor."
(And here, poor fool, I stand once more,
No wiser than I was before... )
[Goethe]
How can you explain to another person what you see (or better: what you do NOT see) .
Funny and not so funny situations due to visual impairment
by Jutta Miroiu-Dunker in August 2018
Here just an excerpt to make you curious:
20 Years Ago
About 20 years ago, when I was in my early 40s and living in Israel, I
had a few routine examinations at the ophthalmologist. As it seemed to
be something unusual to him, he referred me to the ophthalmic clinic of
the University of Jerusalem. They did all kinds of tests and
examinations and told me, that I got a macular dystrophy
- an inherited form like e.g. Stargardt's disease. A detailed diagnosis
was not carried out. In principle, this is irrelevant, because any form
of this eye disease cannot be cured. One eye was more affected than the
other. However, it was immediately brought to my mind that the
degeneration of the macula would progress slowly and that the second eye
might not be spared. The only "good news", they said, was that most
probably I would not go totally blind, since peripheral vision will
usually remain.
The
doctors just were surprised that I was already in my early 40s and
nothing was noticed ever before so. They told me, that this type of
"juvenile macular degeneration" (in contrast to the better known and
more common AMD, i.e., age-related macular degeneration) is usually
noticed in children/adolescents.
In the beginning…
At first, I had indeed not noticed any
problems. Just the usual "fatigue" after long hours at the computer to
do my job. Well, when the eyes get tired, straight lines are just don't
look straight, but a bit bent. This condition stayed that way for a while. Until that key moment about one year later...
Everyone knows a peephole in a door. And
probably, we always use the same eye to look though the fish eye. So do
I. Then, one fine day, it looked through the spy - and the hallway is
gone. "Yikes! There always was something to see!" I looked again and saw
- nothing. So I thought it might help to clean the fish eye, did that
and looked once more. And again - nothing. Strange ... Eventually I
looked with the other eye – and, lo and behold, the hallway was back!
I see! So that's how it is when the
central point of the retina (the macula) does not work properly anymore.
Suddenly there is only a gray spot. Well, as long as it's a small spot
and you can use the other eye to look through a peephole, it's not that
bad yet.
Unfortunately,
over time, this small spot in the macula grew slowly but constantly.
That is, the spot that only covered the small hole of the fish eye
became a larger spot. And also, this spot has different impact over distance.
20 Years Later
Just about a year ago [this was early 2018], actually as continuation of the previous chapters, the situation worsened quite more than just a bit.
Well, I could still recognize text, even
though even black text seemed "grayer and grayer". I could still work on
the computer as a translator. But for how much longer? I had no idea. For work I changed the monitor twice within the previous half year - now it is a 48"curved TV
with originally 4k resolution. Thus, at least accommodated all required
windows and data on the screen even at lower resolution (say larger
font). But still I had to change the resolution every few months. And
"looking around the corner" when reading or writing is more than
exhausting physically and mentally.
I was, however, hoping I could continue
like that a few more years-Maybe even more than the 3 years until
retirement age. Legitimate hope...
With all setups involving glasses,
different computer monitors, font sizes, and you name it, work is
literally just a lot of headache.
I
know, my eyesight will never get better. Slowly but unstoppably, it
becomes even more difficult to see what is in front of my eyes. All
this, even over the last few years, obviously had and has big impact not
only on my work but also impact on everyday activities. And this fact does often drive me to the edge of despair, with all sorts of emotional imbalances.
.
…at the end
Today, after having worked with this condition
worsening until last December, I had consulted my ophthalmologist
towards end of the year [this was still back in 2017]. But the new glasses I got for the computer were
not really effective, so it became more and more stressful and
basically impossible for me to do my job properly.
Well, so I was hoping my optician could
come up with something. But the always optimistic optician - before we
met, he had even set aside a nice new spectacles frame. - checked my
eyes and had to admit he had no more solutions for me. No new glasses or
the like that could help me anymore. He really felt sorry and somewhat
shocked.
OK, next step was to go back to the eye
doctor. And the same thing – no corrective lenses to help me. He, too,
seemed surprised and just asked "How do you still work?". Not that a
really had an answer for him …
Then
now, a few weeks ago[this was early 2018], during a routine check for my mother that I
attended, my ophthalmologist just turned around to me and said: "Your
mother's eyesight is much better than yours." And he added: "Are you
still driving?" –"No, surely not", I replied. "Very good", he continued,
"Because I know a lot of people that are legally blind and are still
driving a car."
------------------------------------------
About this text
Jutta's Story texts were originally written in 2016-2017.
Since end of 2018 I am officially legally blind.
And I am proud to be a member of the Malta Society of the Blind.
No wiser than I was before... )
How can you explain to another person what you see (or better: what you do NOT see) .
by Jutta Miroiu-Dunker in August 2018
About 20 years ago, when I was in my early 40s and living in Israel, I
had a few routine examinations at the ophthalmologist. As it seemed to
be something unusual to him, he referred me to the ophthalmic clinic of
the University of Jerusalem. They did all kinds of tests and
examinations and told me, that I got a macular dystrophy
- an inherited form like e.g. Stargardt's disease. A detailed diagnosis
was not carried out. In principle, this is irrelevant, because any form
of this eye disease cannot be cured. One eye was more affected than the
other. However, it was immediately brought to my mind that the
degeneration of the macula would progress slowly and that the second eye
might not be spared. The only "good news", they said, was that most
probably I would not go totally blind, since peripheral vision will
usually remain.
Here just an excerpt to make you curious:
20 Years Ago
The doctors just were surprised that I was already in my early 40s and nothing was noticed ever before so. They told me, that this type of "juvenile macular degeneration" (in contrast to the better known and more common AMD, i.e., age-related macular degeneration) is usually noticed in children/adolescents.
In the beginning…
At first, I had indeed not noticed any
problems. Just the usual "fatigue" after long hours at the computer to
do my job. Well, when the eyes get tired, straight lines are just don't
look straight, but a bit bent. This condition stayed that way for a while. Until that key moment about one year later...
Everyone knows a peephole in a door. And
probably, we always use the same eye to look though the fish eye. So do
I. Then, one fine day, it looked through the spy - and the hallway is
gone. "Yikes! There always was something to see!" I looked again and saw
- nothing. So I thought it might help to clean the fish eye, did that
and looked once more. And again - nothing. Strange ... Eventually I
looked with the other eye – and, lo and behold, the hallway was back!
I see! So that's how it is when the
central point of the retina (the macula) does not work properly anymore.
Suddenly there is only a gray spot. Well, as long as it's a small spot
and you can use the other eye to look through a peephole, it's not that
bad yet.
Unfortunately, over time, this small spot in the macula grew slowly but constantly. That is, the spot that only covered the small hole of the fish eye became a larger spot. And also, this spot has different impact over distance.
20 Years Later
20 Years Later
Just about a year ago [this was early 2018], actually as continuation of the previous chapters, the situation worsened quite more than just a bit.
Well, I could still recognize text, even
though even black text seemed "grayer and grayer". I could still work on
the computer as a translator. But for how much longer? I had no idea. For work I changed the monitor twice within the previous half year - now it is a 48"curved TV
with originally 4k resolution. Thus, at least accommodated all required
windows and data on the screen even at lower resolution (say larger
font). But still I had to change the resolution every few months. And
"looking around the corner" when reading or writing is more than
exhausting physically and mentally.
I was, however, hoping I could continue
like that a few more years-Maybe even more than the 3 years until
retirement age. Legitimate hope...
With all setups involving glasses,
different computer monitors, font sizes, and you name it, work is
literally just a lot of headache.
I know, my eyesight will never get better. Slowly but unstoppably, it becomes even more difficult to see what is in front of my eyes. All this, even over the last few years, obviously had and has big impact not only on my work but also impact on everyday activities. And this fact does often drive me to the edge of despair, with all sorts of emotional imbalances.
.…at the end
Today, after having worked with this condition
worsening until last December, I had consulted my ophthalmologist
towards end of the year [this was still back in 2017]. But the new glasses I got for the computer were
not really effective, so it became more and more stressful and
basically impossible for me to do my job properly.
Well, so I was hoping my optician could
come up with something. But the always optimistic optician - before we
met, he had even set aside a nice new spectacles frame. - checked my
eyes and had to admit he had no more solutions for me. No new glasses or
the like that could help me anymore. He really felt sorry and somewhat
shocked.
OK, next step was to go back to the eye
doctor. And the same thing – no corrective lenses to help me. He, too,
seemed surprised and just asked "How do you still work?". Not that a
really had an answer for him …
------------------------------------------
About this text
Jutta's Story texts were originally written in 2016-2017.
Since end of 2018 I am officially legally blind.
Since end of 2018 I am officially legally blind.
And I am proud to be a member of the Malta Society of the Blind.
